Someones Girlfriend, Someones Fiancee, SomeonesWife

August 22, 2011 by  
Filed under Boho Bride, our wedding

After 18 months of being engaged and around nine months of official planning, it has finally dawned on me that following our September nuptials I am actually going to be someones wife. Which begs the question, aside from my change of status, what will actually change, if anything?

I have been in a relationship with my beloved for a whole decade. Hard to believe when we look back at photo’s that those fresh-faced teenagers are indeed us…and things were starkly different then. Every feeling felt ‘intense’ – not just the love, but the the pain too…the angst over every harsh word, the constant need to ‘interperet’ what’s been said as if we were always talking to each other in code. Every time a couple we knew broke up…we’d always then have to thrash out whether we could in fact be the next ‘doomed’ pair….gah, it exhausts me to think about it now!

Happy times of course {well we were young and fearless and threw ourselves in to everything feet first!} but once drama school was over, our relationship evolved in a different way. Now twenty-somethings, we bought our first home and set about ‘playing house’. Work was erratic, money was tight and we no longer felt the need to socialise. Too wrapped up in our new status as co-habitee’s, we adopted our eldest fur baby Milo and spent our weekends curled up on the sofa, under a blanket with the cat – eating and watching films. We like to call that our ‘comfy’ stage. We both put on about two stone. I’m still trying to work the last 8 pounds off.

The next stage was the ‘growing’ stage, where we both explored our individuality. I guess this is the time when things can either make or break – ironically it was around the seven year mark. We were lucky though, having moved closer to the S.West and Wales {Reading} so each of us could travel home more, we became quite independant of each other – but rather than that factor pushing us apart – it was like we found each other even more interesting; there was more to talk about and I guess we grew together and found more reasons for our love to deepen.

I still find my OH thirst for knowledge massively appealing – he’s a self made man and works damn hard to continually learn new skills. And I know he really appreciates how I throw myself into things and then figure out how to make it work. Throughout the time mentioned above, we learnt a lot about each other and the kind of people we were growing into during this stage. It was a challenging, but brilliant time.

And then came settled. A blissful chapter that still stands – when you know who who are as both individuals and a couple – and what you’re about. Where you’re no longer looking over your shoulder to see what others are doing, or care about what they think. That bit where you appreciate yourselves for the people you’ve become; this is me, this is us and this is how we roll. Ah, if we could only go back a reassure our teen selves!

So given that we’ve settled into this happy and confident state – what’s going to change? Well, despite me once protesting that marriage doesn’t mean squat if you’re already committed to each other – I do feel a little different already. It might sound shallow – but by standing in front of each other to make those vows, I am expecting a subtle change in our dynamic. He will be my husband and I will be his wife and that tells the world that we hold each other in a higher regard than anyone else on this earth. And we don’t just get to celebrate that together, but all our other favourite people will be there to celebrate with us too.

I’m so excited about our wedding day now – and I really can’t wait to become someones wife.

With Love Boho Bride xx