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The One Where I Get Wedding Anxiety Dreams…

Some of you might recall the anxious feeling I noted down a couple months ago. Well, you might be pleased to hear that my eye-twitch has gone and I’ve been feeling a lot more on top of wedding plans….the general sense of panic has all but completely dissipated. Or has it…

On a day-to-day basis, I no longer feel overwhelmed. Boxes have been ticked and those that haven’t {or aren’t going to be} well I now accept, probably won’t be. You can’t have it all eh? There is however, one issue. My “day-to-day” anxieties have now been replaced with night terrors. I haven’t had a decent nights kip in about three weeks.

I am having very vivid dreams/nightmares about the wedding – but there’s one recurring dream that ensures I wake up feeling clammy and panicked…it’s the day of our wedding and I’m running up and down the creaky stairs of our cottage in my wedding dress but my wedding dress is the only thing I seem to have organised…

I’m always confused as to why I’m in said gown and then it dawns on me that it’s my wedding day, yet I’ve not actually organised any of the details. The venue is sorted…but no caterers, the guests have been invited, but I haven’t told them where to go, Adam {my fiance} knows to show up, but it’s like I know he’s waiting for me to give him orders i.e. what to wear etc…and this is the bit where I always panic most…I open my diary and scrawled across the page is the phone number for our registrar, I hurriedly dial it to ask if she’s free to marry us and just as she says ‘hello’ I always wake up!

And this isn’t the only dream – I have other, random, but very vivid ones, that make me feel physically sick…they’re mainly my OH telling me that he just wants to be friends 🙁 though I also had one a couple nights ago where I was pulling my teeth out…but I knew I was asleep and doing it, so I was also desperately trying to wake up to stop myself!!! Weird huh?

Married ladies, Brides-to-be…anyone….PLEASE tell me this is quite normal? Does it all settle down – or will I be sleep depraved until the big day? How do I stop these feelings from manifesting in my sleep? So many questions!!!

…Though I do now wonder if reading this post  back to myself {I’m rambling right?} might actually induce sleep! *yawn* A very indulgent blog today!

With Love, Boho Bride xx

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  • Claire - English Wedding blog July 7, 2011, 11:38 am

    Oh you poor thing – I hear this a lot. You’re definitely not alone – pop onto a wedding forum and search for dreams, you’ll find plenty to identify with. (and some really weird ones as well)

    But seriously, try and take time out, do something stress-busting – yoga? Pamper weekend with your girls? romantic weekend with your fiance. Let your mind relax for a few days and do non-wedding stuff. Nothing awful will happen if you have a wedding free break.

    Sending virtual hugs!

    Claire xx

  • Jo July 7, 2011, 12:02 pm

    Oh Sarah, you poor thing! This sounds awful, although completely normal during a time of such change, and with so much going on!
    Teeth falling out in dreams is usually interpreted as signifying feelings of anxiety and helplessness in real life – so that makes sense!
    I’ve had periods of sleepless nights before, usually to do with work, and found that very few things helped. HOWEVER, rescue remedy (the night one) seems to be a winner, and also lavender oil in a warm bath, or on/near you pillow. I’m sure you’ve already tried both, but just thought I’d suggest. Hope it stops soon! xxx

  • Lisa July 7, 2011, 12:03 pm

    Thank you so so much for sharing this with us!
    I started having similar dreams back in March (my big day isn’t until December!)…I’m standing in the venue, and then have the horrible realisation that I haven’t sent any invites, ordered any flowers or bought a dress!! etc etc.
    Fortunately, I have now managed to cross most of these off my rather large to-do list, which has eased the nightmares slightly.
    But the biggest help, I think, is that I’ve banned myself from doing anything ‘wedding related’ at least 2 hours before heading to bed – it has helped massively!
    Hope this helps as much as you have helped me over the last few months x

  • Lydia July 7, 2011, 12:25 pm

    Wow. Not just me then!! My W day is in 7 weeks. I have stopped my stressing, like you, but am having nightmares, like you.
    The only thing I have found to help is drinking copious amounnts of wine before bed time…kidding! 🙂 In all honesty I’ve found little to help them, other than before bed I take a cup of decaff tea to bed with a good book and I read until I’m sleepy. Some nights it helps as my dreams are populated with things from the book instead of my own stresses. This stress is completely normal. So I’ve been told!
    good luck.

  • admin July 7, 2011, 1:02 pm

    Thank you all for your lovely messages. Sarah is in meetings today (after another sleepless night 🙁 ) and is so moved by the comments she’s seeing pinging on her phone. She just wanted to send love back xxx (Via Mr Boho Bride!) and will respond this eve xx

  • admin July 7, 2011, 6:58 pm

    Hello! I’ve been itching to get home to say thank you to you all! I had a horrible nights sleep last night & saw all your messages in between meetings today…the relief of seeing I’m not alone nearly made me cry!

    Claire – you always have the best advice {English Wedding Blog – a must read!} and I’m off to Milan on Tue to spend some time with my dearest friend…erm and we’re seeing Take That *swoon*, so should relax! xx

    Jo, I’ve tried the lavander but definitely getting some rescue remedy tomorrow – forgot that even existed! Ah, that’s cryptic about the dream meaning (just googled it) thanks, makes me feel less nuts! xx

    Lisa, soooo amazing to hear from a fellow Bride who’s having crazy dreams (though I wouldn’t wish it on anyone) You’ve no idea how much your comment gave me the warm & fuzzies. So Lovely. Thank you. I hope yours dissipate soon too xx

    Lydia, wow 7 weeks – not long now lovely!!! 🙂 Erm I must concur abt the wine (slept like a baby Fri night post drinky drinkies with my friend Josie!)Just started reading One Day, so hoping my dreams are filled with this book and not the murder-fuelled thriller I have been reading – ha! Hope plans are going well & that you get to sleep well soon!! xx

    Ads, cheers gorgeous – and sorry my nutty Bridal moments are making you loose sleep too! xxxxx

  • Caroline Starrs July 8, 2011, 1:56 pm

    I’m going through a period of sleep talking at the moment I keep waking poor OH by shaking him saying “wake up wake up!”

    I also sprung out of bed at 2am a couple of nights ago to find the receipt for our wedding ring deposit, I’m not sure why.

    Amid my odd behaviour the OH keeps having just really odd dreams about what he will be wearing, he has had one where he turned up in a bright gold suit and another where him and my mum were wearing the same clothes!

    To avoid panicking I’ve finally done a spreadsheet for everything, I’ve done so well not needing it but with 13 weeks left I’m a bit overwhelmed with all the little bits left.

    We’re nearly there!!xx

  • admin July 9, 2011, 4:21 pm

    Hi Caroline,

    Sounds like we’re in a v.similar situation! Awful the way your mind can’t switch off – think you’re right to do the speadsheet…something I’ve really failed on!

    Hope you get a good nights kip soon and best of luck with plans xx